Monday, May 5, 2008

A Better Day Dawns...

This morning we woke up early—we had turned in pretty early last night, so we were able to get over to Franklin Square's NICU and see Becca and mom was able to breastfeed. It was very nice to spend some time with our daughter.  There is no question that having Becca (and our 2-year old Brady who returns from staying with Aunt Wendy tonight) softens the blow of losing Hope.  As difficult as this has been for Laurie and me, it's hard for us to imagine what it would be like to go through this kind of loss without other children to focus on.  We have two children that need their mom and dad and they are our motivation to keep going. We have to help them understand that their sister is with Jesus and hold on to her memory. 

We were able to spend a few hours in a Parents Room at the NICU.  They wheeled Becca in and there was a bed for Laurie (just a couple days removed from major surgery) to lay down, which was great.  It was a wonderful time for mom and dad to bond with their daughter.  Mom in particular got to spend some much needed time with Becca. Laurie commented that Becca seemed as content as she has been since she was born—I'm sure that's true since she is with mom and dad. 

Earlier this morning, the doctor in the NICU detected that Becca had a heart murmur.  Such a condition is not uncommon for infants, and we do have a family history of heart issues (Laurie has one).  So Becca had an EKG done.  They wheeled her out to do the exam, but our daughter apparently was hungry because they only got halfway through the exam before Becca started crying.  Michelle (the NICU nurse) bought her back and mom was able to breastfeed again (and dad was able to work on his journal, which is some of what you are reading now.)  They will finish the EKG later.

At around midday we went home and Laurie's friend Donna Herritt visited and bought us lunch. After lunch, we were able to rest.  Mom was able to pump and her milk supply seems to be coming in—this will make Becca happy. ☺

Plans are for Brady to return home this evening with Aunt Wendy and family and for us to go out to Franklin Square to see Becca so mom gets another chance to nurse and Brady gets to meet his new sister.  Juxtaposed around these happy events will be planning for Hope's funeral.  At this point it looks like we might do it Saturday at Lodge Forest UMC but plans are still TBD.

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SmallTownMommy said...

I am a friend from Laurie's message board. You are all in my thoughts and prayers.
Kathy (Kathe4602)

Katy said...

I am also a friend of Laurie's from the board. I too lost a twin. Lauren passed at 37W and we celebrate the life of Emily, our survivor. I am so thankful you were able to hold Hope and be with her as she passed. I promise, you will cherish and remember those moments forever.

It is so difficult to celebrate a new life while mourning another. Words just don't give it justice. I'm so sorry you have to go through this.

You and your family have been and will continue to be in my prayers. Katy (bug41704)

Amy said...

I'm also a friend from the board and I just wanted to say how much of an inspiration you have been in your faith through all this. While it's not the same by any stretch, I lost my sister two weeks before giving birth to my son. Grieving and attaching simultaneously is next to impossible, and I remember feeling so weak in my faith during those days. I pretty much depended solely on the prayers of others because I felt too weak to pray myself. Laurie even sent me a wonderful email during that time which brought me tremendous comfort! I will now be praying for you and your family. For God's loving comfort and for peace that passes all understanding.

Ronnie Rabbit said...

Alan, I wish I could offer you more than my sadness. I hope you, Becca, and Laurie all stay well.

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