Thursday, May 8, 2008

A Brief Respite

Events from Wednesday May 7

Today was a somewhat less hectic day. Once we got home from the hospital, we didn't really have any more appointments all day. In the afternoon we had lunch and then took some time to relax. Laurie was able to spend some quality bonding time with Becca, which was good for both mom and daughter. I was able to just plain take it easy for a while, which I badly needed. I had a chance to check e-mail and so forth.

I found out that my company will only grant me three days leave for Bereavement. This sucks and I don't think it's really fair. Apparently three days is "standard company policy" and "consistent with what other companies offer." I don't really care about all that right now; I think they need show a bit of compassion for a grieving father and consider that I am in fact burying my daughter this weekend and at least give me a week off for bereavement. We get hosed as fathers to begin with because the company won't grant any paternity leave, and then you have something happen like what has happened to us and they add insult to injury by not being willing to give any extra time off. I asked my supervisor if it was possible to get a couple extra days for Berreavement, but alas the answer is, "No". It kind of seems like people don't matter in these moments; the policy is what it is and doesn't get changed. In their mind I should be done grieving by tomorrow morning; after that it's the same as if I were on vacation at the beach or something. This means I have to burn through my Universal Time Off—the same leave I would need to take a vacation—which is already limited from all the time I've used for various doctor's appointments and so forth during pregnancy.

Laurie's mom made us dinner—meatloaf and mashed potatoes. Simple comfort food is good right about now. Laurie's friend Beverly (who was with us on Sunday when we said goodbye to Hope) came to visit us and got a chance to see Becca. I was completely exhausted this evening. I supposed the stress of the past week is starting to catch up to me and I finally had a chance to stop long enough to crash and burn.



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